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Emotionally Exhausted

Woke up emotionally exhausted today. I could feel it coming on yesterday and tried to turn it around with meditation and a bubble bath, but I guess sometimes ya just gotta feel the feels. The meditation said something interesting “Don’t try to push away bad feelings. Think of them as a good friend, in a bad mood, that just needs your support”.

Fathers day and Mothers day always eat at me. I was born to teen parents – never met my mom, and my dad was in and out of my life. When he WAS around – he was drunk and abusive. I was raised by a combination of my aging grandmother and whatever family member could take me in.¬† ¬†Every Fathers Day and Mothers Day, I grow increasingly tired of all the happy, lovey posts. It’s not anyone else’s fault that my parents are fuckups….its not like I wish everyone else had tortured childhoods and shitty parents….so idk why it annoys me so much when these days hit.

Anyways…I wont drink over this, and I’m not worried about that – but this is the shit I hid from with drinking, and now it’s the shit I need to get through sober.